Dealing With Resistance In The Elderly

Taking care of an elderly loved one can be a challenge – especially when they don’t want your help. However, understanding the reason behind the resistance to caring can often foster communication and cooperation.

What Is The Cause Of Resisting Care?

If a loved one needs to be cared for, it probably means that they are dealing with some loss. This loss can take many different forms – loss of mobility, loss of a partner or spouse, loss of physical or mental health, memory loss, or independence loss. It may also mean a change in their routine or an invasion of privacy.

It can leave a loved one feeling vulnerable, afraid, and angry or result in guilt or feeling weakness about having to rely on others. They may also have concerns about the cost of care. In some cases, resistance to care may be due to stubbornness.

How To Approach A Loved One About Needing Care?

In many cases, a doctor or medical professional will open the discussion about the need for care. However, if you suspect that your loved one is resistant to the meeting, whether you or a doctor broached the subject, the following steps may be helpful:

Step 1 – Evaluate the type of care that your loved one needs relevant to the different available care options.
Step 2 – Approach your loved ones when they are in a calm and relaxed state of mind. They will be more likely to listen and respond well to the discussion.
Step 3 – Allow your loved one to express their preferences – do they prefer a loved one to provide the care, a home care assistant, or a care facility. Even if you may not fulfill their wishes, it is essential to listen to what they want.
Step 4 – Ask friends and family members to support the decision to introduce care and help you persuade a resistant loved one.
Step 5 – Don’t quit. Give your loved one time to think about the discussion and talk about it again in a few days without being too pushy. Be patient and don’t give in to frustration and anger.

What Are Effective Strategies To Resolving Resistance To Care?

The following tips can encourage cooperation from a loved one who is resistant to care:

• Give your loved one the option of a trial run for a selected care option or various care options if possible.
• Explain to your loved one how accepting care will give you peace of mind and make your life easier.
• Approach the subject from a positive angle as an enjoyable activity and highlight the benefits.
• Talk about the cost involved, whether this is time or money. Your loved one may be concerned about the cost and who is going to pay for the care.
• Put yourself in their shoes while keeping the big picture in mind. Pick your battles carefully.

Feel free to contact your Lavender Springs care facility today. If you want to get our home office in Texas, you can reach us at (512) 698-7285. We would love to hear from you!